A New Year.

by Toyokazu Nagano

Since I won't be home for New Year's Eve, I just want to wish everyone and anyone out there, a Happy New Year!! 

You might want to forget all about this year cause it hasn't been a good one for you or you might wish to remember this year cause it has been a great one for you.

Either which, do welcome the new year for there is much in store for you in 2012 and you won't know till you live life. 

I can really ramble on and on since I'm in a hyper state right now, but I'll keep that for some other day. 

I hope everyone has a good new year/ holiday season.

I'm really blessed to be surrounded by amazing and caring people.

And I hope everyone gets to feel the same too.

So, HAPPY NEW YEAR!! 

Cheers to a new year.

And the many surprises it'll bring you. 

Till then. 

Sweetness overload?

I found this somewhere written by a guy.
You got to admit, it's pretty sweet.
And true too.

On a different note altogether, I feel I have yet done so many things in life.

There's so much I yearn to do and the list seems endless. 

I've heard so many predictions for the year 2012, it's hard to stay positive when you hear remarks that next year is not going to be a good year especially for the economic.

The market is going to go down even further, more people will loose their jobs, natural disasters are going to strike the world even more aggressively... and the list goes on.

With all this pessimistic predictions circling around everywhere I go, conversations I overhear, articles I over read, it's pretty much written down in stone that it's going to be a challenging year ahead in 2012.

But me, being me, I tend to be optimistic, not overly but still one.

So you can say whatever your mind tells you to but I choose to believe that 2012 is going to okay for me, probably even a good one. 

It might be a new transition, nearly blinding, neither a smooth one but I'll survive. 

It's going to be hard coping with a new environment and new friends and keeping up with the old ones but I'll cope.  

It's not going to be easy but I'll make it through.

There is after all so many things to look forward to and a multitude of things-to-do-before-I-reach-20 I have yet done.

Don't let the world get to you. 

My randomness and I strikes again. Teehee. 

Till more ramblings. 

Christmas in town.

I know it's already Boxing Day but so what?!

Merry Christmas & Happy Boxing Day!!!

I guess when you spend Christmas night in a hospital, your perspective of a festive celebration changes. 

You learn to be more grateful and more appreciative of the people around you.

You learn that things are always tangible and nothing is ever permanent. 

Someone you really look up to and love and respect may be there one day and be gone the next. 

That's how vulnerable human beings are.

We're anything but immortal.

It makes you miss the people you love who aren't there by your side because of physical distance, even more. 

It's just one humbling experience.

Whenever you're faced with a tough situation that just seem hopeless and futile, there's always the little things there to be grateful of and you can just simply smile, keep a bright outlook and crack jokes.

Things aren't always what it seems and it helps to have a little optimism in all of us. 

I just want to wish everyone I love and am acquainted with to have a very Merry Christmas and Happy Boxing Day. 

I hope they are safe and well and having a good time wherever they may be.

God bless them all. 

Till then.

Stay jolly. 

Who do you listen to?

Your heart or your hard-headed brain?

If it was only that easy.
What are you going to do next year? What are your plans after SPM? What course are you doing? Have you decided which college you're going?
Questions, questions and more questions.
Ain't that the one million dollar question.
That also costs a million dollar. (depending on the career you're pursuing)
If it was only that easy.

Well, if it actually was, it wouldn't be life would it?
There are so many options, choices and indecisive thoughts and likings.
How are we to really know?

I'm grateful that I have amazing people around me to guide me and give me the best of advice, wanting nothing but the best for me.
Ultimately though, the final decision lies within me in my hands.
And it's not something of a decision to be rushed overnight.
It requires mulling and countless days of sleepless nights and doubts flooding the mind till the dam breaks.
But I do know what I have in mind for myself and that is good for me now.
For I plan to achieve my short term goals while striving for the long term ones.

I'm going to leave this post hanging and maybe get back to this some other day...
After all, it's a work a progress.
My life is. And it's a good thing at this stage.

Till then.
More carols and Christmas cheer to pass round this festive season.  =]

Here and Gone Again.

Thank you for everything.

Somehow I lost the writing bug. Temporarily I pray.
SPM was over for me a week ago, and I'm only here now.
That speaks volume.

SPM was anything but easy. I'm glad I made it through, albeit with flying colours or not is a whole different story which we'll know in prolly 3 months time.
I doubt I would made it through the past 3 weeks without my "angels" being there for me.
It's times like these I know I have people whom I love there for me, always reaching out to give me a gentle push in the back whenever I need it and a shoulder to fall back on whenever I'm falling.
Now that high school is officially over, it feels surreal.
I guess it won't really sink in yet till next year officially starts and I find myself loss in a crowd of strangers instead of the hallway full of familiar faces and friends talking a tad too loudly over the chatter.
And heck yeah, I'm horribly and terribly scared.
I feel like a fish out of water, only worse.
That's one thing to deal with.

Part of me wants to go with the easier path, more comfortable and less daunting route, but if I really listen to what I really want, then I should just go with what I choose instead of what the society and peers choose for me shouldn't I?
If that's the case, then why do I get sudden attack of anxiousness telling me that I might have made the wrong choice. Might.
Just so I didn't have to carry out half the effort I have to if I did otherwise.
Simply put, the easier way out.
So why didn't I go for the easy way out then?
If only I had the answers.

This past week has also been lots of 'firsts' for me.
I know I'll always remember them. Especially the 5th of December.
Thank you for being there for me and accepting me for who I am, flaws, imperfections and all.

Before I end, I would just want to say that I'm truly blessed with absolutely wonderful and amazing, splendid people around me.
I really do not know what to do without them.
They'll claim I'll survive but I'll say otherwise.
So all I have left is a simple Thank you and my actions to show my gratitude and gratefulness.

This post is dedicated to Chris, Gwen, Ming and Sam (in no particular order) and to whoever whom reads my blog. 

Till then.

P.S. I think you'll find closure after a while or a long while but you'll feel at peace with yourself. That's when you truly know you're ready to move on to a whole new chapter of your life.