Bare.

I'm totally appalled. And disgusted.
How could the a********** do this?? *bewildered*
A piece of land stripped off. Everywhere brown. It's suppose to be green.
Ugh... Suddenly you turn to look and it's gone. I thought I was hallucinating.
I had to blink several times before I realized that I wasn't. blink blink.

It used to be a turf of land.
A forest.
Green.
Was all I could see.
But now all there's left,
Are a piece of land.
Bare, Hollow.

I love nature. Sure, I'm a city girl but so what.
Day by day,
Second by second,
The trees are depleting.
Thanks to you b****y m*****s.

Adults. Honestly. They really do think the world revolves around them.

The need to actually have a glimpse of trees is getting more and more intense every single day.
It's just weird.
Even mum noticed it.
I can't even give a reasonable explanation.
It's just a desire.
I wish I was born in the country.
I don't need the luxury.
All I need is the sight of clear blue skies and thick, green lush forests.
That will make my day.
Forever.

So to all of you out there....
Have a heart.
Nature is a part of us.
Love it, not destroy it.
Appreciate God's marvelous creation.
Hug a tree.
Do something.
Hug a tree.
Talk to it.
Anything.

I'm not very convincing thanks to my disappointed but you all pretty much get what I meant.


Tree-hugger is off to bed now.

Damn.

Seems like I haven't blog for ages.... I was either too lazy or uninterested.

A week of holiday just whizzes past in a blink of an eye.
I'm not allowed to sleep late or wake up late. *Sighs* Where's the justice in this?
But to those who know me well, I do live by the quote, " Rules are meant to be broken."
So I try to sleep as late as possible and wake up as late as possible. Live life the fullest. Why shouldn't you?
I want the holidays to last longer even if it means more lectures, nagging and scolding. But I don't have to be burdened by the fact that I have to wake up at 6am every morning, remembering my new timetable for tuiton classes, adapting to form 2, mingling with the kids in my new class and many other factors. Which reminds me, I haven't rant about the reshuffling of the new classes.
I'm neither contend nor appalled by it. I have friends here but I do have people whom I don't get along very well with in the same class as well. Too bad there aren't any boys, they would have enlighten the atmosphere. There would be a hell lot of cat fights next year with a class filled with 36 young, poised, demanding, violent, crazy girls. Seriously, I want to write more about them but I'll leave it out for the moment.

Let's get back on the current topic.
Because of the Kumon High Achiever's Camp I'm going to miss Huge Camp and the Malaysian Philharmonic Youth Orchestra since it's on the same date as the camp. Damn the timing to the fiery pits of Hades. This camp better be fun or I'll be fuming for the rest of the year. I mean it. Of all dates, why oh why must these three be on the same dates? Aren't there any more other days? And I don't even have the chance to choose. *Sighs* I can't choose to not go. Mum will kill me. Christie will slaughter me in pieces. What choice is there but to go... And to Christie, you know the truth now.

I've drawn everything down to two and most probably I'll take that but I still can't find much information about it. Apparently, no one likes to create their own websites.

Nonchalantly, Calvin takes who-knows-how-long to reach his house. From 2 something till 7 something and he's still not at home. So much for his, I'm near home now. His depth perception of time has apparently gone off.

And Gwen, don't worry, I followed what you suggested. I was tempted to talk to the plush toy though. Don't mind me if I do. But if I really do, you might think I went mental or something. I miss you. And I did not tell him you were the one I have a crush on though you want me to say that. Makes me sound like someone crazy now. Haha... Be safe and back fast.

That's all for today. No pictures for once. That's a change.

Last performance.

Today was the last performance for the year.
Everything went really well during the first show for me. I remembered everything and did everything. That was a total relief. We went live on both days. Cool right?
Performing in front of the crowd doesn't give me nerves anymore. Maybe just a little but it's definitely fun getting so many people's attention once in a while. I gained lots of confidence since yesterday. But Michelle was acting weird all day and stuff, zonking out once in a while. Since we went early, we did some aerobic exercises along with a group of break-dancers and the tv3 people. That was definitely a laugh. Virginie sure knows how to move.
After the first show, we went to alamanda again. Ate and walked around. Soo Jean and I were at Speedy the longest. After all of us bought an ice-cream, we helped Aunty Kim carry her groceries while Cindel and Virginie were squabbling over the definition of rain and whether drizzle was under rain.
The conversation was roughly like this.

Cindel: See, told you not raining la...
Virginie: Drizzling is still rain. From the sky what.
Cindel: Who say so?
Virginie: Me. I read the dictionary one you know.... Once a moth.
Me: Once a moth?
Virginie: Yeah, once a moth. *laughing*
Cindel: Yea la, your own personal dictionary. From your head one.

Totally crazy. It goes on but I'm rather lazy to type everything. It is after going to be 1 am now.
Then we waited for ages, went live for a few minutes, got hit by Cindel, had no idea how Queenie slipped on my skirt, did another performance and went back to school. The end. Not.

I have to admit though, I love cheerleading. It's just pure exhilaration. The work-out, the dance, the stunts, the performances, the crowd. It's one of the things that actually makes going to school fun. It's just not about the popularity or anything, it involves lots of hard work, integrity, passion for the sport, confidence and the willingness to push yourself to go that extra-further.

I watched Romeo and Juliet. Bought the cd. It isn't that good. Reading it would be much better but it doesn't hurt to watch it. The ending ends with the sounds of the sirens of the ambulance. And coincidentally an ambulance was passing my house with it's sirens. Deja vu?

Some people are a disappointment but I getting rather used to that. Thou shall not aggrieve thee no longer. I shall have fun without you.

I have nothing else to type anymore. Even if I do, I don't feel like doing it now. One thing though.

I've never stop hoping. One day, I know I'll discover it. Reinvent it. Mould it. Shape it. Till then, I'll not stop searching. Why should I?

A lonesome figure,
Thinks in solitude,
But it's not,
For there's always someone,
Watching you,
From Above.

1st day.

First day of performance today.
Totally a let-down.
I made so many damn mistakes.
For no reasons, there were so many butterflies fluttering in my stomach.
And Michelle told me that she had a bad feeling something bad was going to happen. It turned out to be true.
I was like so depressed after the first show. Drowning myself in mistakes as I sat and thought of nothing. Thinking of it makes me just so mad at myself.
It's not the first time I was performing in front of so many people, in fact I wasn't nervous about that at all. My fear was making mistakes. It is the first time I become a base and I'm not strong enough to carry Cindel. If it was Shanny, I wouldn't have any problems. Cindel's not heavy but like I said, I'm not strong enough. So it was extra hard-work for me, not to mention, Michelle's hands were bruised and Lai Hoong was still new at becoming at a back-supporter. The hardest part was doing double-shows, an elevator and then a cradle after all the dancing and I always mess up the countings. Terrible.

At least things got better after that. It wasn't that bad during the second and third time. I hope everything goes on smoothly tomorrow. I know I can do it. If only I just don't panic and calm myself then everything will be fine. See.. I'm getting better at comforting myself without the help of anyone. Proves that I still capable of doing something actually right.

I got sun-burned in the face too... My face's all flushed.

Here are some pictures of the cheerleaders excluding me. Alex, if you're reading this then I'm telling you that I'm not interested in taking pictures of myself so I won't put them as display pictures. *sticks out tongue to you*

Here goes nothing...

Do not cross the border of our territory.

Totally shocked.

A tangle webble.

Just grin.

Eye-to-eye contact or lips-to-lips? =p

Dreaming...

What on earth was she doing I wonder...

Cindel and Lai Hoong.

That's all.... The end.

Last day.

What do you young guys have to say on the last day of school??
Most of us already treated the passing days a holiday long long time ago when the exams ended.
But today is the official last day of school!!
Now I can whine all about the holidays... cause I know I'm going to have a not-so-fun time either then going out with some of you guys.

I have so many reasons to get whiney but now that I'm going to type all of them out, my head suddenly becomes blank. How great. *snorts sarcastically*

Mum suddenly gets all fired up, not in a good way and starts scolding....
Without any sensible reason. Parents. If I ever am one, I'll have no idea what I should do.
She's getting more and more absurd by the ticking seconds and I mean it literally...
Think of it as an understatement.
How I'll survive this holiday will be a miracle.
Deluding myself won't help that much, at least not anymore.
All I can say is blame it on adolescent or puberty.
If you can't find where the problem lay in you, just blame it on something. That's how we tend to act without realizing it till we've done it.

I've an epiphany.
I'm not meant to get along with other people. Maybe just for a little while.
But I still can't get along well with other people. Period. The end. Full-stop.
I don't even have the explanation for myself but it just is.
Pretty frustrating to think of it but not know why.
A cloud of dread hangs over me.
And I know is that it's something to do with me.
I just don't get it.
Someday I might or maybe the answer is already there without me even noticing it.
I'll get over it, I know it but with the help of the 'few' of you.
The 'few' of you are really special, you just know how without knowing why. I'll always treasure the time you've spend eventhough I know they won't last long. But it's more than enough.

I might be lost,

In a maze with no ending,
Going around in a never-ending circle,
Tired, lost, drained,
But determined to continue,
For I have no reason to stop,
You were always the candle,
With your light,
Flickering in the dark,
Guiding me, comforting me,
Teaching me the true value,
Of friendship,
The word 'Thanks' is hardly sufficient,
All I can offer,
Is the return of an honest friendship.

A day.

She twirled around the room,
Wrapped in her own world,
Consumed in a bubble,
Not noticing the changes around her,
As she spinned faster and faster,
Moving ever gracefully,
Showing no signs of stopping,
Not intending too,
As her emotions spilled out,
Betraying how she felt,
Gradually feeling peaceful and calm,
Smiling to herself,
Even when she felt anything but happy.

When I watched the show, I thought of that.
It doesn't rhyme at all. *sighs*
At least it's something though.

I went to school for cheer practise today and yesterday.
I went earlier today cause mum had to sent aunty to the hospital.
She had denggi and all my cousins were out to work.
So I sat in school reading "Northern Lights" by Philip Pullman.
Looking around once in a while.
Then came Cindel and Queenie.

I know the whole routine already.
Most of it by heart.
A few mistakes here and there.
And I still can't dance well enough.
But I enjoy attending cheer practises.
My new nickname for now is 'kisses', 'hugs and kisses' or 'xo'
Mr. Chong keeps call me that since he can never remember my real name.
Either he calls me someone elses name or dragonfly.
I didn't get it until I saw what Virginie wrote on the paper.
Since all of us became 'O's to represent our places, our initials were put beside them.
So my initial was X and he read it as XO and said it out loud and asked who's hugs and kisses, everyone else just laughed.
But Sue Jin's nickname was the best. It's so called after a bus company.

Three more days of school and that's it for the year.
Fast right?
In a blink of an eye, it's the end of the year.
It's the same everytime but I can never get used to it.

The quote, "Why be ordinary when you can be extraordinary" keeps popping in my head.
I can't remember where I read it.
But something keeps nagging me.

I guess that's all for today. Don't feel like sleeping yet though.

p.s. Go to www.freerice.com.
Go on... You won't regret it.

Godchildren.

Woke up late. Was suppose to meet Gwen at the club at 8am but I woke up late. I can't help being a sleepyhead Gwen.. I slept late. And you wanted me to go at 7am?
Played badminton with Gwen for an hour while talking. Then she ate her breakfast while I stole her food. She showered and her mum brought us to pavilion.
Gwen's mum and her mum's friend went to J.CO Donuts to eat while Gwen and I went to the food republic to eat. We both ordered different food and we shared.
We started talking again. We were already talking anyway.
We talked about the fights we had nearly every day last year, our friends then we started talking about the future.

We wondered how would it be like to meet our gang when all of us finished form 5 and when we go university/college and start working. We laughed over the possibilities. One of the thing was about bachelors. You can guess what's that about.

Gwen said all of us would definitely be separated. It's nothing surprising. Then we argued who would marry first. Me or her. We started squabbling and laughing non-stop at the stuff we thought of. Then we made a deal. If she had kids, her kids would be my god-daughter or god-son or both and mine likewise. Imagine, in the near future, I'll have either a god-daughter or a god-son or both.
We even agreed to be bride's maids at each other's wedding! Crazy us. Guess we were really mental then.

Anyway, we had fun and that's all that matters. I'm definitely going to miss her when she's in Australia. Remember what you promised Gwen. I doubt I will forget it so I hope you won't.

We decided to disturb Jeff. I knew he had tuiton but i forgot what time and Gwen wanted him to help her so she called him. He told her that he was at Martin and ended the call. We missed called him for a few times just for the laughs of it.

That's all for now. I have lots to type but I'll save it for another day. I'm sure I have lots of time to post them if I'm not glued to the television. =p

I'll just be who I am for now.