Triggered.

Tomorrow's the DAY!
Can you believe it?
It seemed like it was just yesterday I sat at bleachers and cheered for my seniors while I controlled the music with Michelle.
And tomorrow I'm going to be the one on the mat doing what we're been practicing for months.
That totally triggered me.

I pray that everything goes well tomorrow cause there's a heavy veil of doubt obscuring my vision.
Fear eludes me. What if one of our stunts fail to go up? What if I can't be able to do my walk-over or cart-wheel round-off? What if my toe-touch doesn't go up? What if I suddenly forget my steps?
What if... I'm full of what ifs.
My body aches. My hand still hurts. But I'm still determined to do it.
On the outside, I'm cool and composed but I'm the inside I'm a turmoil of nervousness and fearfulness.
Mr. Chong said it's normal to feel this way. It means you're ready to do your best on the mat.
But it makes me wonder, is it really true? Cause what crosses my mind right now is that I'll totally forget everything, my steps, position, counting, the moves, the chants, the everything...
I've experienced it before last year during one of my performances.

The best is to not think about it right? Right? ( you better say right of I'll mash you up. =p )
The best solution is to pray hard and put my trust God and my team members.
No matter what, as long as I give my very best, I'm satisfied.
To be honest, I'm not expecting to win any awards. I know the standards. I witnessed how the other teams are. I accept the facts.

A very, very big thank you to all my friends who are supporting me for the competition and thank you for your good luck wishes.
And to Christie, thanks for being there for me when I was being emotionally unbalanced. Sorry that you had to experience it. Thanks for the very, very BIG hug. I needed it. You comforted me and cheered me up. What more could I possibly ask for?
And to my pet brother, Jeff, I would like to thank you in advanced. He agreed to treat me at ABC after the competition on Wednesday. Thanks! I'll work hard. I promise. Scouts honor! How to let you down when you have faith in me? *ponders but comes up with nothing* Don't forget to treat me cause I won't allow you to forget. =]
And to Nav and Nat too, who are going to support my cheerleading team. Thanks guys!
And to Ivan for lifting my spirits up and encouraging me to do my best tomorrow.
And to Xun Kin who was concerned about my cheerleading.
I just want to wish everyone thanks. It has been a hard week for me with so many things bombarding me at once. But thanks to God for giving me strength to keep going on and all of you guys, everything is going to be fine.

I do hope that you'll include me in your prayers. Pray that no one will get injured during the competition and that everyone will do their best tomorrow and the day after.

Lots of things are going to change after cheer. The one thing thats for sure is that I'm going to miss cheerleading and that I'm going to focus more on my quiet time with God, my studies and my guitar. I'll be keeping myself preoccupied cause that's how I like it cause...

My dinner's calling me. Time to feast. Hope to see any of you guys tomorrow.

P.S. Isn't the above picture of the girl simply marvelous? It's Virginie by the way. Name an expression, she'll do it for you in snap.

~ Kell's out.