Heavy hearted.

Today was the last day of Vbs. I'm going to really miss all the kids. I've got myself attached to them especially David and Derren. It was really a great experience testing my patience, energy, self-motivation, love, judgement and being unbiased. It wasn't easy just as Li Quin had predicted. Working along with her, Ivan and Crystal was something totally unexpected. I was the assistant coach but Ivan introduced me as Coach Kelly so all the kids called me that. It was weird at first but I got used to it. Ivan did something unexpected today. I was shocked at first but he kept me encouraged.

Let's start with yesterday. It was so tiring, more tiring than the day before and i woke up later than the usual. The kids were more lovable then ever. All the kids adore Ivan. He sat on the stage yesterday and lied there. All the kids jumped on him,swarmed all over him and hung on to him tightly. Crystal and I were just laughing heartedly as the whole thing occurred in front of us. Pastor Wilson had to order them to get off from Ivan but this little girl [ whom's name I can't remember ] continue to lie on him.

The hardest part was actually making the kids to listen. I pitied Li Quin. She was telling a story but none of the kids listen, only one or two i guess. It was just so hard to make them pay attention and listen. But that isn't that all, one of the toughest is taking care of the Down Syndrome kids and there were three of them in my class. Brian Lee was fine since he was the more responsive one and listened but the other girl and Kok Siong were the harder ones. I was asked to shadow Kok Siong and I can't even count how many times he managed to weasel away from me when I turned around. He's a kid that loves dancing, singing, jumping from high places and not to forget, banging stuff too. The other girl [ Cheong something... I'm not good with names. ] pulls other people's hair, pry open people's bag, take anything that's pink, steal stuff and has a really strong grip, determined not to let go. Leandra is always mad at her for taking her stuff and not giving it back so I had to intervene every single time.

I was the girl giving out ketchup yesterday. We had chicken burgers. At the beginning, no one wanted ketchup but after a bite, screams were heard asking for ketchup. I was the only one holding a bottle of ketchup so I had to rushed here and there fulfilling all the kids demands. I didn't mind a bit though. They all asked politely and we ate with the blue team. [ I'm the green team. ] After lunch the kids time to snooze but the boys ended up running around, shouting and screaming. It took a long time for them to calmed down.

David Teo and Deren Lee were real attention grabbers. When Deren sat on my lap, David would get jealous and I had to persuade and cooed him. Mind you, he's just a seven-year-old kid. He won't let go of my hands and was determined to hold on to it. Once in a while I had slowly pull my hands out of his grip as I had to take care of Kok Siong and the other Down Syndrome girl. Ivan was trying so hard to control the whole class even with the help from the three of us. When I was paying attention to someone else other than him, David gets really upset. Whereas Derren would be up to mischief if I didn't paid attention to him. It was so hard to juggle between David, Derren, Kok Siong, Cheong and the other kids eventhough there was the other 3 helping. But it all paid off.

Derren was a goofy boy when he comes to me and demands attention. But I love David the most and I know I'm being biased here eventhough I know I shouldn't but I just can't help it. He gave me a kiss on the cheek yesterday when the it was time to go back. How sweet is that?? It's unexpected from a seven-year-old hyperactive kid. The pastor thought I was his brother when I managed to quieten him and got him to sit with me. He refused to listen to everyone else. The pastor was so surprised when he heard that. David made me accompany him downstairs with his sister [who looks very similiar to him that you would know they were sibling right away ] and would not let go. It took a long time persuading him but he did finally let go. I hung out with the other assistant and coaches for a while. I met Daniel. A form 4 guy. He was a funny, goofy, startling, humourable guy. We had fun talking and kept bursting into gales of laughter as we talked. He was stating how short he was and all that while being bugged by his sister who was meddling with his cap.

Ivan carried Eugene and Eugene wanted revenge so he asked Bryan for help. One of them carried the hands while the other carried the legs. Ivan was terrified and all he could stutter was he didn't like anyone to carry him when he was being carried. All of us just laughed and laughed. Then they made jokes saying that Bryan could carry Ivan all by himself eventhough he was younger. While Eugene and I were walking back to his house [ it was just a few kilometres ] we were busy debating and rebutting.

I met a standard 5 girl whom I saw a few times before and we instantly clicked. She stayed back so we talked and arm-wrestled. I had a really enjoyable day yesterday till dinnertime. I won't state anything about it as that will break my bubble.

Today wasn't that bad. I have to thank Ivan for helping and encouraging me to do something I didn't had the guts to do. After what happened to Li Quin I didn't want to do it. Ivan was good at scheming stuff. Li Quin was looking for one of our lost lambs, kid's i mean and Ivan suddenly told the kids he was telling them a story. After asking the kids to choose which story he wanted he told the kids, "Ok everyone, gather here. Coach Kelly is going to tell you a story."
Me. " Wha--? Me? "
All Ivan did was grinned triumphantly and said, " I have to take something. Help me tell them the story." Then to the kids, " Kids, gather around Coach Kelly and listen to her. " and he fled.
After what happened to Li Quin, I just stood there gaping while David tugged on my shirt, pulling me back into consciousness. I took a deep breath and told myself, "Here goes nothing," before plopping myself onto a chair. My voice came out amazing different than what I felt inside and guess what... ALL the kids were paying ATTENTION!! ALL!! I was so shocked. It was unbelievable. Even when Ivan was telling a story, a large number of them weren't paying attention and Ivan was a great storyteller. Compare me to him, I'm just an amateur. I just continued, stumbling on my words twice or thrice. Ivan and Li Quin appeared out of no where when I started the story. Ivan was practically beaming. David stood in front of me as I told the story, wanting the attention all to himself. When the story ended, one of the kid shouted " So short one, I want some more." The other kids agreed and look longly at me. In my heart I was telling myself NO WAY eventhough the other part said, sure, no problem. Thankfully Ivan was smart enough not to push my limits and told the kids they could get those sticker tattoos. I caught him grinning at me, somehow congratulating me while the kids rushed to him. Li Quin just beamed at me. Who thought the kids will actually pay attention to me? The feeling of it feels so great and makes me all bubbly inside.

My love and patience was pushed to it's limits today. And I really mean pushed to the limits. Kok Siong somehow disappeared himself while the kids were having snacks and reappeared himself when we were ready to get to the next station. He made some hand signs stating he was hungry so I told Ivan since he was the "big guy". Ivan told me to bring him to the place where we ate. As I went and settled him down, David rushed in to pull my hands and told me that they were going up. I told him go up without me and the look on his face was so sad that I felt like abandoning Kok Siong and follow him. My consciousness came first, thankfully. Kok Siong was a special needs child and wasn't capable of taking care of himself so I stood firm and promised David I would come up later. David slowly let go of my hand and trudged slowly to the door, turning back to look at me. I knew I did the right thing but somehow I wished I could go with him since today was the last day I could see him. In the morning when I told him today was the last day we could see each other, he said that we could see each other next year and sat put beside me, refusing to sit with the other kids.

Helping Kok Siong to eat wasn't easy. He kept playing with the water machine and couldn't decide if he wanted popcorn or biscuits and ended up taking both. I was being as patient as I could, hoping he would be quick so that David wouldn't be that sad. But Kok Siong took really long. By the time he finished his popcorn, Bryan's class came in. Bryan was sort of surprised to see me. Kok Siong wanted to eat ice-cream and he still hadn't finished his biscuits. I insisted him to finish his biscuit before giving him the ice-cream. [ He thought it was ice-cream but it was actually strawberry yogurt ] While eating his second biscuit, he said that he didn't want it anymore and wanted ice-cream and water. I gave him water and asked him whether he wanted the biscuit again but he just keep saying he wanted ice-cream. Afraid that he would start screaming, I gave the yogurt to him. Bryan caught my eye and just smiled at me as he understood the whole situation. A little encouragement for me to go on being kind to him, I guess. My patience was already over the limits and I could have burst anytime. Bryan just kept on smiling before taking care of his class of kids. He offered to help a bit but I could handle it. Finally, Kok Siong finish everything and I convinced him to go up the stairs. Well, he crawled instead of walk but at least he did go up.

David didn't pay attention to me at first but that didn't last long. He came and tugged my arm, asking me to sit with him and to play the games with him. He's definitely going to be someone really special and the girls will surely go ga-ga over him. He's such a charming boy. I absolutely love him.

I had to leave before everything ended and didn't say goodbye to anybody except Ivan and Li Quin. Ivan was liked he got snapped from a dream when I told him bye. I couldn't blame him. Being in charge of the kids wasn't a light job. It is the most tedious thing ever. He was grateful for my help and I know he really meant it. Li Quin was startled but caught herself on time and replied. Luckily Eugene was distracting David and Deren was busy up to some mischief. I didn't think I could bare saying bye to David. But I did gave him a goodbye message on his key-chain that he wanted from me. He twisted and turned his words, somehow asking me to write something on his key-chain.

I felt heavy-hearted, leaving early, not saying bye to all the little kids and my new-found friends whom were Timothy, Daniel, Bryan, Ruth, Carmen, Phoebe, Sophie and many more. But mum will never accept any excuse and I knew it. I will be back next year. The thought of it comforts me a little. I'm am going to miss all of them. They left footprints all over my heart.

I know this is really long but once I start typing, I won't stop. Besides I did promise to post an extra-long post after that short one.

P.S. If you actually read the whole thing, I'll congratulate and thank you for spending your time reading it. If you did not, well... it was expected.

Till little kids, smiling angels [the kids] and love. [ in it's purest form]